What's new
By:
Filters

Great Lines from Movies

General Jack D. Ripper: Mandrake, do you realize that in addition to fluoridating water, why, there are studies underway to fluoridate salt, flour, fruit juices, soup, sugar, milk... ice cream. Ice cream, Mandrake, children's ice cream.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: [very nervous] Lord, Jack.
General Jack D. Ripper: You know when fluoridation first began?
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: I... no, no. I don't, Jack.
General Jack D. Ripper: Nineteen hundred and forty-six. 1946, Mandrake. How does that coincide with your post-war Commie conspiracy, huh? It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hard-core Commie works.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Uh, Jack, Jack, listen... tell me, tell me, Jack. When did you first... become... well, develop this theory?
General Jack D. Ripper: [somewhat embarassed] Well, I, uh... I... I... first became aware of it, Mandrake, during the physical act of love.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Hmm.
General Jack D. Ripper: Yes, a uh, a profound sense of fatigue... a feeling of emptiness followed. Luckily I... I was able to interpret these feelings correctly. Loss of essence.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Hmm.
General Jack D. Ripper: I can assure you it has not recurred, Mandrake. Women uh... women sense my power and they seek the life essence. I, uh... I do not avoid women, Mandrake.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: No.
General Jack D. Ripper: But I... I do deny them my essence.


[Strangelove's plan for post-nuclear war survival involves living underground with a 10:1 female-to-male ratio]
General "Buck" Turgidson: Doctor, you mentioned the ratio of ten women to each man. Now, wouldn't that necessitate the abandonment of the so-called monogamous sexual relationship, I mean, as far as men were concerned?
Dr. Strangelove: Regrettably, yes. But it is, you know, a sacrifice required for the future of the human race. I hasten to add that since each man will be required to do prodigious... service along these lines, the women will have to be selected for their sexual characteristics which will have to be of a highly stimulating nature.
Ambassador de Sadesky: I must confess, you have an astonishingly good idea there, Doctor.


- Dr. Strangelove or How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love The Bomb (1964)
 
Capt. Peterson: [hostile tone of voice] What are you two HOODLUMS doing in this hospital?
Hawkeye Pierce: Ma'am, we are surgeons and we are here to operate. We just waiting for a starting time. That's all.
Capt. Peterson: You can't even go near a patient until Col. Merrill says its ok and he's still out to lunch.
Trapper John: Look, mother, I want to go to work in one hour. We are the Pros from Dover and we figure to crack this kid's chest and get out to golf course before it gets dark. So you go find the gas-passer and you have him pre-medicate this patient. Then bring me the latest pictures on him. The ones we saw must be 48 hours old by now. Then call the kitchen and have them rustle us up some lunch.
[turns to Hakweye]
Trapper John: Ham and eggs will all right.
[turns back to Capt. Peterson]
Trapper John: Steak would be even better. And then give me at least ONE nurse who knows how to work in close without getting her tits in my way.
Capt. Peterson: [outraged] Oh!
[turns to leave and bumps into Nurse in Japan]
Capt. Peterson: Oh! Fool!
[stomps out of ward]
Nurse in Japan: How do you want your steak cooked?

- M*A*S*H (1970)
 
Batman: [to Lucy] If this relationship is going to work out between us I need to feel free to party with a bunch of strangers whenever I feel like it. I will text you.


Emmet: I'm just gonna come right out, I have no idea what's going on or what this place is at all.
Unikitty: Hi! I am Princess Unikitty, and I welcome you all to Cloud Cuckoo Land!
Emmet: So there are no signs on anything. How does anyone know what not to do?
Unikitty: Here in Cloud Cuckoo Land, there are no rules: There's no government, no baby sitters, no bedtimes, no frowny faces, no bushy mustaches, and no negativity of any kind.
Lucy: You just said the word "no" like a thousand times.
Unikitty: And there's also no consistency.
Batman: [the clown and the lizard man are dancing around him] I hate this place.
Unikitty: Any idea is a good idea except the non-happy ones. Those we push down deep inside where you'll never, ever, ever, EVER find them!

- The Lego Batman Movie (2017)
 
Last edited:
Justin: You can't fight what we had together.
Martha: Justin, it was one night. It was a massive mistake. I was drunk out of my mind. You could have been a donkey!

[first lines]
Daniel: [giving instructions to the pallbearers] Just, uh, straight through there and to the left, please.
[they set the coffin down]
Undertaker: Would you like to...?
[Daniel nods, the Undertaker opens the lid]
Daniel: [looking] Who is this?
Undertaker: Pardon me?
Daniel: That's not my father.
Undertaker: [checking] Oh shit, we've taken the wrong one.

Daniel: Everyone's in the garden! Quick, we have to move the body now!
Robert: Brilliant!

Daniel: I can't believe what a nightmare today has been!
Jane: Well, it's been sort of exciting, hasn't it?
[off his look]
Jane: For a funeral, I mean.

- Death At A Funeral (2007)
 
Sergeant: Hello Nicholas.
Nicholas Angel: Hello Sergeant.
Sergeant: How's the hand?
Nicholas Angel: Still a bit stiff.
Sergeant: It can get awfully hairy out there. I'm surprised you weren't snapped up sooner for a nice desk job. That's what I did.
Nicholas Angel: I prefer to think my office is out on the street.
Sergeant: Indeed you do! Your arrest record is four hundred percent higher than any other officer, which is why it's high time that such... skills... were put to better use. We're making you sergeant.
Nicholas Angel: I see.
Sergeant: [mumbles]
Nicholas Angel: In where, sorry?
Sergeant: In Sandford, Gloucestershire.
Nicholas Angel: But that's in the country...
Sergeant: Yes! Lovely!
Nicholas Angel: Isn't there a sergeant's position here in London?
Sergeant: Oh, no.
Nicholas Angel: Can I remain here as a PC?
Sergeant: No.
Nicholas Angel: Do I have any choice in this?
Sergeant: No!
Nicholas Angel: Sergeant, I kinda like it here.
Sergeant: Well, you've always wanted a transfer to the country.
Nicholas Angel: In twenty years or so, yes.
Sergeant: Well done you.


[seeing Webley's barn full of guns]
Nicholas Angel: Where on earth did you get these?
Arthur Webley: Found 'em.
Danny Butterman: He found them.
Nicholas Angel: And what is this?
Danny Butterman: Sea mine.
Arthur Webley: Sea mine.
Nicholas Angel: Well, Mr. Webley this is an extremely dangerous collection, it's a wonder nobody's been hurt before.
Arthur Webley: Nah, just a lot of junk.
[He hits the mine with the butt of his shotgun. With a creak, it slowly tips onto its side and starts ticking softly. The three men exchange a look]
Nicholas Angel: MOVE, MOVE, MOVE!

Danny Butterman: So what made you want to become a policeman?
Nicholas Angel: Officer.
Danny Butterman: What made you want to become a policeman-officer?
Nicholas Angel: I don't remember a time when I didn't want to be a police officer... apart from the summer of 1979 when I wanted to be Kermit the Frog. It all started with my Uncle Derek. He was a Sergeant in the Met. He bought me a police pedal car when I was five. I rode around in it every second I was awake - arresting kids twice my size for littering and spitting. I got beaten up a lot when I was young, but it didn't stop me. I wanted to be like Uncle Derek.
Danny Butterman: He sounds like a good bloke.
Nicholas Angel: Actually, he was arrested for selling drugs to students.
Danny Butterman: What a cunt...
Nicholas Angel: Probably bought the pedal car with the proceeds. Needless to say, I never went near it again. I just let it rust. But I never lost the profound sense of right and wrong I felt at the wheel of that pedal car. I had to prove to myself that the Law could be proper and righteous and for the good of humankind. It was from that moment that I was destined to be a police officer.
Danny Butterman: Shame...
Nicholas Angel: How so?
Danny Butterman: I think you would have made a great Muppet...

- Hot Fuzz (2007)
 
The best line ever!

montoya.you-killed-my-father.-prepare-to-die.-face.gif
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top Bottom Back Refresh